Diario de FullaBella, 18 mar. 13

Yes, that was me, the woman literally down on her knees, eyes closed and face tilted toward the heavens praying in the middle of a crowded trade show on Saturday. For about ten minutes I thought I'd lost my rings. Specifically, ZsaZsa (the 20th anniversary diamond ring MH gave me that is so huge and ostentatious it demanded it's own name) and HIS wedding ring (his fingers are smaller than mine so I have been using his to keep ZsaZsa from falling off since he can't wear it anymore anyway.)

Once I found them I prayed in gratitude then followed with prayer for serenity, wisdom and strength. I never pray for patience anymore because my Grandmother told me praying for patience is always answered in trials and tribulations. But I prayed. I don't know how long, I just know I didn't dare open my eyes and stand until the roaring in my head ceased.

When I finally stood, I felt at least 20lbs lighter. Although my scale won't likely reflect the same this Wednesday I indeed felt it in my soul.

Less than an hour after the ring recovery though I thought I'd lost my cell phone. I remembered answering a text while trying to use the bathroom and I envisioned my phone still balanced on the sanitary napkin dispenser in the stall. I reacted with 'are you freaking kidding me?' and stalked toward the bathroom only to find on second pat-down the cell phone was indeed in my shirt pocket. I think the trader at the table in front of me thought I was signaling for him to steal second.

So on the heels of all that and a really slooooow trade show yielding not enough money to enourage me to return a second day I took Sunday off. Good thing too, as I was having really low energy yesterday and confirmed I wasn't imagining it when my blood pressure reading yielded only 100/45. So whew, needed some rest. I did a little backyard gardening and necessary house keeping along with getting the Easter Baskets ready but mostly vegged and read journals.

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Alright, let me tell you about Chia seeds. According to the web searches I did yesterday it is 'the' food for 2013. In case you're wondering, Kale was the miracle food for 2012. Everything has a shelf life.

Despite the silly commercial 'Cha Cha Cha Chia' song, I finally ordered some at MH's request because it seems every diet guru hawking their book on the morning news mentioned it. My precious little bag of the weird looking stuff came in last week but until yesterday I had no time or interest to do anything with it.

I added a tablespoon to my oatmeal for dinner. While my blood pressure read low my appetite yesterday was anything but (low). Water, distractions, reading, etc., nothing was silencing the growling in my stomach. So I thought 'oatmeal for dinner, that oughta give the stomach a good workout' and I am here as an non-compensated user to report 'wowza'. They do plump up and they do satisfy the hunger. And I'm not just drinking the kool-aide; this is actual results.

In the event you read my journal last week about my 'breakfast' ritual and thought 'ya know, you should have non-food related things you do nice for yourself too', I do. My Sunday usually includes an evening soak in my spa tub. For a couple of hours I sink down in the hottest water bearable short of boiling my body and totally zone out to a movie on my laptop (setting on a table safely away from the tub).

I have tried quiet meditation or books on tape but it leads to me kicking water out of the tub. Too quiet considering my day to day requirements of tuning out distractions. I'd never survive in a convent or a monastery; one day in silence and I'd run screaming out the door. I can take a vow of chastity and poverty and scrub floors on my knees but please give me an MP3.

So while soaking in my tub and watching something mindless on my laptop, I sip a flavored tea or water and snack on dry cereal. My favorite is cinnamon wheat chex but lately I have been enjoying Fiber 80 in Chocolate. I rationalize as it's only once a week it's an acceptable amount of processed carbs and good grief, if that's still too much, well, so be it.

Last night, after the chia seeds though, I didn't want the cereal. I ate a couple and thought 'Eh... not really getting into this.' Two hours passed and no urge to snack even mindlessly. Normally when I get out of the tub I want to chew the door off the fridge (which is why I only soak once a week) but last night, nothing. So conclusion: weird, fine, one night I didn't want to snack, could be a fluke.

You can also add the seeds to water and they expand and make a very interesting looking gelatin. I'm sure with green food coloring it would look like kiwi. I added a tablespoon of it to my water bottle this morning ~ it was kind of fun. Like drinking sea monkey's or something, LOL because the seeds do move up and down in the bottle slowly from 'something' I just don't know what but I've always been easily amused.

They really don't have a 'taste', just an interesting texture. They made my oatmeal very fluffy ~ even moreso than the time I tried adding eggwhites. So this morning wondering if last night was just a fluke I tried them again in the oatmeal.

I couldn't finish the serving. Halfway through I was done with a capital 'I'm really not hungry.' I sat there looking at it thinking 'ok, how do I record this' because I'd actually added coconut oil too. I decided 'record the whole thing, if you eat over your RDI today go back and reassess but for now stop obsessing. It's not like having a 10,000 calorie deficit has yielded an expected 3lb loss this month. Do you think the scale cares what you record in FS?'

And the last personal Chia seed experience I can share is they are very high in fiber; 4grams in one tablespoon. So, uh, well, you can draw your own conclusions on the thing I don't want to put into writing. Let's just say 'fluffy oatmeal, very filling, loads of fun in water and won't be needing any metamucil for now', okay?

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I wanted to share something else but it escapes me. If I remember it I'll journal about it later or tomorrow. My brain needs a leash because it keeps wandering but refuses to come back on any consistent basis. Then again, maybe my days would be more fun if I lost my mind completely. I know my reality certainly isn't bringing a lot of pleasure and I just had the most hysterical conversation with my sales rep that left him wondering if I was drunk, high, or both. I am neither. This insanity thing may be alright after all.

Thank you for reading.

Bella

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1392 kcal

Grasa: 65,32g | Prot: 91,57g | Carbh: 112,41g.   Desayuno: Fage, Sauerkraut Libby, Coconut Oil EfaGold, Chia Spectrum, Quaker Old Fashioned Oatmeal. Almuerzo: Albacore Tuna Starkist. Cena: Crispy Sauerkraut, 's Stripey Jack Cheese, Garlic Mushrooms, Coconut Oil Efa(, Spinach, Onion, Cucumber, Tomato, Breakfast Ham. Pasa Bocas / Otros: Spectrum Chia Seed, Cottage Cheese 4%, Triple Berry Schwan. más...

2058 kcal

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